Thursday, July 16, 2009 by Mike Lowrey.

It seems that a factory worker has discovered a new way to die…

By Falling into a VAT of Chocolate.

Soooooooo…….a chocolate Mu Fugga dies in chocolate tub. I can’t even make Shyt like this up folks.

Yeah…Yeah…you’ve told me a million times already…. I’m going to Hell for this one!

(video not working for FFox users, it’s displayed as a white box but works fine for IE users…sorry)

CAMDEN, N.J. - A man who prayed for a job for weeks dies in a tragic accident at a chocolate factory in Camden, N.J.
Police were called to a warehouse and manufacturing facility on the 700 block of North 36th Street around 10:45 a.m. Wednesday for a report of a man who had fallen into hot chocolate.The Camden County prosecutor’s office identified the victim as 29-year-old Vincent Smith II of Camden. He was a temporary worker at the Cocoa Services Inc. plant.Smith was loading chunks of raw chocolate into a melting tank, but he slipped and fell into the tank.Co-workers shut off the valve and tried to reach him, but failed.The moral of this story is that you dumb asses that are running around praying for Shyt like crazy need to stop.
White Jesus is busy catering to me and doesn’t need your ignant ass prayers distracting him
You dumb asses that are praying for Shyt like extra biscuits, husband/boyfriend, or a car need to beware.

Cuz your dumb ass is like to to choke to death on that extra biscuit, get beat to death by hubby, or drive that car off a fuggin cliff.

I know this is a sad time for the family but, WTF is up with his relative with the huge ass shades asking I need to know what happened?
His ass died in chocolate that’s what happened…what part wasn’t you clear about.
He FELL. The end. Can I help your ignant ass with any other questions?

Damn dude wasn’t even getting benefits cuz he was temp. Shyt if I can die at some Shyt I’m at least getting life insurance from them and overtime.

Let’s be real for a second….Anyone else think that this dude ain’t fall and actually jumped his big ass in to eat the chocolate.
(Yeah…Yeah.. Imma burn in hell, you sound like a broken record …for the younger generation or a scratched CD)

But in any case I’m not eating chocolate for fear of find little niblets of this dude in my snickers bar.

This guy tried to jump in and save him…

He gets mad props for trying to save dude.

But unlike Thickcrust… I ain’t eating any melted chocolate that touched this guy.

Posted in Food, OMG | 1 Comment »

Monday, July 13, 2009 by Mike Lowrey.

Ok, I know some folks are gonna say I’m on that Shyt again.
but seriously I made my first skin bleaching appointment for next week.

And………………………………………………………Go:

• So none of you dudes are remotely straight huh?
• I guess Coonery, Shuckin’, Jivin’ and  TomFoolery is cool to today’s Black youth…
• I’m thinking MickeyD’s should change the golden arches to a rainbow
• This is yet another reason why I don’t go to church
• Riddle: Why does it take women so long to realize that guy they have been dating is actually a gay singing buffoon
• I think the 400 pound cameraman caught the Holy Ghost and started shouting half way through the song
• I seriously doubt this Shyt will win an American Music Award

I’m thinking MickeyD’s is starting to become racist in a way so I called up my boy whose an investigator to look into this Shyt and he uncovered some shocking info…

He loves chicken way too damn much…and if he whips out a slice of watermelon Imma have to pop a cap in his coon ass.

Posted in Ignant Negro Activity, Food, Random | 1 Comment »

Friday, June 26, 2009 by Mike Lowrey.

This Shyt here is straight insane.
Now I know why my boy Thickcrust always wants to buy me a burger with extra ketchup every time I’m in NY.
Adam I will never eat a burger near you and I’m getting a restraining order.

Here’s the vid:

Now on the real if a Mu Fugga comes over to me while I’m eating a damn sandwich and starts nibbling on my damn crotch area, the Mu Fugga better have D cup tits and a Vagina (a real vagina not a fake surgical used to me a man type of a vagina).

Yo, I would have to stomp a mudhole in that dude.
I’m mad that Negro is just sitting there letting this Bytch eat pickles off his crotch and suck burger grease and ketchup off of his fingers looking like Kirk Franklin.

Posted in Food, OMG | 4 Comments »

Tuesday, June 2, 2009 by Mike Lowrey.

Prosecutors say a woman in a Detroit suburb has been accused of fatally stabbing her father after an argument over a dinner roll.

Wayne County Prosecutor Kym Worthy on Wednesday charged 42-year-old Ava Maria Gordon of Melvindale with second-degree murder in the death of Gordon’s 62-year-old father.

Police say Gordon told investigators she ate a dinner roll that her father had been saving even though it had a note telling her not to do so. Prosecutors say Gordon stabbed her father after an argument.

It doesn’t say if they were Black or not but…
If someone dies over a piece of chicken, slice of pie, or a biscuit a Black person is involved.
But if someone dies over a dinner roll then I’d bet on a White person being involved.

Posted in Food, OMG | No Comments »

Monday, June 1, 2009 by Mike Lowrey.

I’ve been getting emails from ladies asking to see Mike Lowrey’s Big Meat!
After thinking bout it for a while I decided to make your dreams come true.

BigDaddy has enough meat to feed all ladies. I’m down to show the ladies what BigPoppa’s working with…

I’m gonna put it all out on front street, please ladies try not to drool.
And fellas close your eyes because if you don’t you will have an inferiority complex after seeing these pics.

Here’s my meat…freshly delivered for $200 bucks, prime cuts to add to my freezer that already had 4 fillet Mignon, and 2 NY strips

Six Bacon Wrapped Fillet Mignon

Two Fillet Mignon, Two New York Strips

4 Rib-Eyes

8 Bratz/8Polish Sausages

40 Shrimp on Skewers

8 Hamburgers/8 Franks

Lastly 8 Italian Sausages

I recently went to a Murder Mystery Dinner. For those who don’t know that’s a dinner in which a sort of a whodunit takes place and the people who are dining need to help solve the murder case. There were two shootings, a stabbing and a poisoning all while I ate bacon wrapped fillet Mignon and chicken wellington while sipping on a few Hennessey and cokes. Overall a decent time but was it work $70 per person plus drinks and tax = $175 …Nope, Not a chance.

Posted in Food | 1 Comment »

Friday, April 24, 2009 by Mike Lowrey.

Thickcrust I’ll order an extra special Dominos Pizza to be delivered to you tomorrow!

CONOVER, N.C. (AP) — Authorities say two Domino’s Pizza workers in North Carolina each face a felony charge after a video posted on YouTube showed one of them putting cheese in his nostril and waving meat under his rear end while assembling a sandwich.

Police in Conover say 31-year-old Kristy Lynn Hammonds of Taylorsville and 32-year-old Michael Anthony Setzer of Conover are each charged with distributing prohibited foods.

Domino’s spokesman Tim McIntyre says the workers were fired and there is no evidence any of the tampered foods were served to customers. The Observer-News-Enterprise of Newton reported the store was closed to decontaminate it.

A deputy at the Catawba County jail says Setzer was released on bail but Hammonds was still being held Wednesday.

A man identifying himself on the phone as Setzer’s father says the family is not commenting.

These Nasty Ass Fu#kers need to get beat down!

Posted in Food, Random | 2 Comments »

Thursday, April 23, 2009 by Mike Lowrey.

It’s been a while since I posted about some food so here it is:

The La Cima Club at hte top of the Towers in Los Colinas, TX

Mahi Mahi & Tilapia with pineapples and veggies with cracked black pepper

Benihanna’s Irving/Las Colinas

Lobster tails, Shrimp, Chicken and Beef Julienne

Del Frisco’s Steakhouse

36 oz, Kobe Steak on a longbone  Price: $70

I played myself one time I ate at iii Forks restaurant in Addison by ordering a $120 bottle of wine that sucked!

Posted in Food | 2 Comments »

Thursday, April 9, 2009 by Mike Lowrey.

On my way to work I was able to slow down and capture this:

(click on all photos for a full size picture view)

In TX this type of thing is common as we drive at  an avg of 65-85 mph.

What’s up with this!!!
I never heard of this Bama Jelly before…I say we boycot WalMart for this racism Shyt!
Get on this Rev Al! Not to mention the Bama E-Z squeeze bottles below.

I guess it’s soo hot in Arizona that their bottled water turns into Vapor and they expect people in Bklyn to buy this BullShyt.
Not only are we paying for water.. but now we have to pay for vapor too?

This is one of my favorite dishes from the Texas Roadhouse

Can someone explain to me why this crazy ass chick is wearing a Birthday Cake???

Posted in Food, Random | 2 Comments »

Tuesday, January 27, 2009 by Mike Lowrey.

Scrimps n’ Stuff

I was a bit hungry so I headed to a few spots for some takeout:

Grilled Chicken Flatbread, Cheddar Biscuits
& Breadsticks with Alfredo Sauce.

I may have gone a bit overboard with the bread items.

Posted in Food | 7 Comments »

Monday, January 19, 2009 by Mike Lowrey.

Here’s a few pics of some of the delicious meals I’ve had here in TX:

From Mike Anderson’s BBQ
Smoked ribs & smoked sliced beef with some mash & beans

Just to make your mouth water Katie:

From ThaiSky; Fresh Mango & jasmine sticky rice

NY doesn’t know what it’s missing. TX rocks just look at my local
Mickey D’s: That’s right fresh popcorn & cotton candy sold at McD’s!
Crazy hot…right?

O.M.F.G.!!
Why did Waffle House bring me orange juice from a bucket?
Better question is…why did I drink it???

Posted in Food | 1 Comment »

Friday, December 19, 2008 by Mike Lowrey.

You know that you’re a guy when you look beyond the obvious.
(in a certain king of way)

I was viewing this picture I took of the new Lex G470 with
the dumb looking trunk door:

But I after looking at it for 2 seconds my mind immediately started
to wander and I started to think…(I wonder how big this woman’s ass is?)

Its big & hot, a full 12 inches of mouth watering,
lip licking deliciousness …

Damn  get you mind out of the gutter its only a
foot long corney dog!!!

No I wasn’t trying to describe myself, but if you ladies are curious
and you must know, I can give you a hint…
Here’s the brand of condoms I use:

Posted in Food, Random | 4 Comments »

Saturday, December 13, 2008 by Mike Lowrey.

They be cookin’ them O’s!!!

I haven’t been to the store in a while so I decided to roll on through
for a quick dozen.

Nah I wasn’t trying to put the free paper hat on or anything.
A brother wasn’t trying to play himself like that.
Doesn’t the hat look like something that thickcrust would wear
around NY?

Even though I was getting grossed out with the large amounts
of glaze dripping in the machine I still ate them donuts up mad quick.

I think they sprinkle crack dust into the glaze!!

Because everyone I know get the shakes after an hour if they don’t
have a second donut.

Posted in Food | 3 Comments »

Sunday, October 5, 2008 by Mike Lowrey.

This post goes out to Katie…

I’ve never had a corn dog but as soon as I saw this thought this looks like something Katie would enjoy.

You know what else they seem to eat down here in TX?
Apparently they “Fry Everything!!”

Imagine sitting down in NY for some fried ribs, or fried alligator kabobs!

Posted in Food | No Comments »